20 Signs You’re Too Obsessed With Your Weight

If you’re stepping on the scale before and after meals, or if you adjust the way you stand on the scale to tweak the numbers, this is a compulsive behavior that will only get worse over time. “Unless you have a physician-prescribed reason to get on a scale, weighing yourself once a week is enough,” says Bonnie Brennan, senior clinical director of adult services at the Eating Recovery Center in Denver, Colorado. A 2012 study from the University of Minnesota found that frequent self-weighing was linked to more weight-control behaviors (both healthy and unhealthy), more depressive symptoms and lower self-esteem in women. Weight naturally fluctuates throughout the day, so if you’re inclined to step on the scale daily, Brennan advises doing it first thing in the morning, after hitting the bathroom and before breakfast for the most reliable data.

You might absentmindedly feel for a hip bone or collar bone, check for lumps in your thighs or stomach or just assess your jawline or cheekbones in every reflection. “Body checking is a common sign of preoccupation with weight and body shape,” says Marjorie Nolan Cohn, RDN, a national spokesperson for the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics and co-author of Overcoming Binge Eating For Dummies. “Often people who body-check are doing it constantly, and it’s somewhat, but not completely, OCD in nature.” If you catch yourself sizing up your imperfections—we’re not talking about checking your rear-view for panty lines or your teeth for stray lipstick—quickly switch gears to discourage the habit.

Broccoli good; potatoes bad. “The more we use this phraseology, the more susceptible we are to judging ourselves by what we eat,” says Christine Peat, PhD, assistant professor in the department of psychiatry at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. “It gives food too much importance.” Of course you don’t want to eat only candy bars or doughnuts, but no food is inherently good or bad, Peat says. Try to think of foods as fuel for a healthy body. That means hitting all the micronutrients, like the potassium, magnesium, and vitamin C in potatoes, as well as the vitamin A, vitamin C, and vitamin B6 in broccoli.

Whether you’re afraid you’ll go hog-wild on the margaritas and mini hot dogs or that people will comment that you’re not, isolating yourself to focus on weight loss-related pursuits is a red flag that your focus is getting too narrow. Brennan has patients who have a really tough time with holidays like Christmas and New Year’s because they feel pressure to eat and see people. But isolation is not healthy. “When you close yourself off, you become victim to only your own self-deprecating thoughts and messages,” Ressler says. “You’re not getting any feedback that would challenge those unhealthy beliefs or assumptions.” You can also feel like you’re alone, which often spirals into depression and eating disorders, Peat says. Some of the most important checks on a budding disorder are friends and family saying, “Hey, I’m kind of worried about you.” If you’re saying no to drinks, dinners, and parties that might mess with your diet or exercise protocol, it’s time to get in some healthy social interaction—and the support you likely need.

Every doctor will tell you that regular exercise is essential for just about every aspect of your physical and mental wellbeing. But it really can go too far. “People can develop a compulsive or addictive relationship with exercise in which they struggle to maintain a rigid routine,” Rosenfeld says, “and they’ll land in a sea of negative emotions when they’re unable to work out.” Compulsive exercisers will squeeze in a sweat session no matter what—even if they have to miss family or work obligations or ignore an injury or illness. They routinely push themselves too hard and suffer overuse injuries, burnout, and exhaustion. If you’re putting exercise ahead of everything else, especially sleep, and if the thought of missing a workout makes you sweat, signs point to obsession.

And not because you’re looking for a date. “When you meet someone, you immediately do a body scan and think, ‘hmmm, she looks a little hippy—my hips are better,'” Ressler says. “You’re assuming that size, shape, or weight is the most important thing about that person, and ultimately, it’s an indication that you’re obsessed with your own size and shape.” You might also silently criticize people for their choices, like ordering pasta or drinking soda. Ressler encourages people to seek out other qualities to value, such as sense of humor, a warm smile, or trustworthiness. You’ll not only deepen the social experience, but over time, you’ll feel less insecure about your own body weight or shape.

Social media, with people snapping selfies all day long, has fanned the flames of disordered eating. “A lot of patients judge what they look like based on how many likes they’re getting on a picture or whether people comment on how slim they look,” Peat says. And time offers an opportunity for unhealthy comparison. “If a picture has been up for six months or a year, women might go back and say, ‘when I posted that photo, people said I looked so slim and great, but that’s not happening with this new photo—does that mean people think I look fat?'” It’s okay to post pictures and relish compliments, as long as you don’t let your 1,240 friends dictate how you should feel about yourself.